Today's
fun topic is answering machines for land lines. I have heard some of the
greatest messages, all alike:* Hi, I'm not home now. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as I return home. (This presumes your phone and furniture are still there when you return home.)
People, it's hard enough to keep your home and family safe as it is, do NOT advertise on your answering machine that you are not home. Here are some other tips:
* If you are a female living alone or with a child or children, and you have to make the recording, do what a colleague of mine does: "Hi. Neither Cam nor I can come to the phone at this time. Please leave a message." Cam is her son; she is divorced. But strangers don't know that.
* If you are a female living alone, either use a canned recording or get a male friend of yours (preferably with a deep voice) to record a message.
Just remember...it's always "We are not available to take your call." Advertising you are not home will get you in trouble.
For vacations, either be able to call your home periodically and pick up messages remotely, or have someone do it for you. Almost every answering machine is set up the same. If there are no messages on it, the phone will ring 4 times before the answering machine kicks in. If there are messages on the answering machine, it only rings twice. It doesn't take long for a bad guy to figure out that no one is there if he keeps calling and the phone only rings twice.
Finally, NEVER leave your last name or your phone number on your answering machine. E.g., "Hi, you have reached 313-555-1212. We cannot take your call at this time...." Bingo. It takes about 10 seconds to find an address for that phone number. Same with your surname. "Hi, you have reached the Rousselles. We cannot take your call at this time...." A quick look in the phone book, and you know where to go to rip them off.
This also applies to cell phones, which, for me, is my only phone. My phone is on 24/7, so rarely does anyone get the message I've left, but if they do, they will hear in a very deep, scary voice: "You've reached Blackdog. If you have a specific message, leave it. If you just want me to call you back, hang up. My phone knows who and where you are." No one ever leaves a message. :)
